FROM THE EUROPEAN NEWS NETWORK (ENN): "All the news, with a European Flair, delivered by a Eurobabe!"...DATELINE: EUROPE/BONGOLESIA:
World Financial Leaders and Banking Organizations today voted overwhelmingly to reject the validation and international financial recognition and accredidation of the recently proposed and released "Bongolesian Express Card".
In a joint statement released by Financial and Banking Leaders and Lenders throughout the world, it said the following:
"It is with heavy heart and after much consideration that we have decided to reject the validation and financial recognition necessary to accredit the Bongolesian Express Card. This rejection in no way reflects ill will upon the nation of Bongolesia, nor it's people, but instead focuses on the unanswered questions having to do with market stability, government regulations, international trade and financial goodwill, and most of all the fluctuation of Bongolesian Currency upon the world financial market. The fact that the card carries a 875% interest rate has also raised a few eyebrows..."
The Bongolesian Express Card...You can't leave home without it....actually you can, but now no one will recognize it as valid....
National Government Spokesman Sp'in Doktur discusses the current hijinks surrounding the recent snubbing by monetary institutions around the world...Upon learning of the refusal to recognize the new credit card for Bongolesia, National Spokesman Sp'in Dok'tur spoke in reply:
"It saddens us, as a nation, and a people, and for his Exellency, President-For-Life P'hat Daddee B'wonah, it just breaks his heart to see us treated this way once again, by other nations that have a "We're better than you, n'yah!" attitude. You would think that in this day and age, our former European Colonial Occupiers and their flunky allies would wanna do the right thing and okey-dokey this card to show that Bongolesia would be a good place to invest, and spend your money in as much as possible. It seems though that all they wanna do is play games with our nation and our people until they can get their way once again. Well, I don't know about you folks, but I think that that ain't gonna happen for a loooooong time."
Sources in Sudekia say that due to this recent "look down their nose at Africa once again", mentality and attitude, they expect the financial markets to work against the validity of the Bongolesian Currency, known as "The Bling-Bling". This will increase prices throughout the country and lead to inflation, as well as perhaps even fuel more civil unrest while the government attempts to solve the situation.
Meanwhile despite a curfew and increased police/security presence, civil unrest continues in Kensington-Hyde-White and Waughtown for a second day as for the first time, the delightful aroma of CS riot control gas graced the air and noses of protestors. Despite firing dispersal gas into the crowds of protesters and day shoppers at the local outlet store, civil unrest continues in these two cities, with the largest and most active in Kensington-Hyde-White. National Government officials are working with local leaders to stop the unrest and address issues of concern and restoring order.
"It saddens us, as a nation, and a people, and for his Exellency, President-For-Life P'hat Daddee B'wonah, it just breaks his heart to see us treated this way once again, by other nations that have a "We're better than you, n'yah!" attitude. You would think that in this day and age, our former European Colonial Occupiers and their flunky allies would wanna do the right thing and okey-dokey this card to show that Bongolesia would be a good place to invest, and spend your money in as much as possible. It seems though that all they wanna do is play games with our nation and our people until they can get their way once again. Well, I don't know about you folks, but I think that that ain't gonna happen for a loooooong time."
Sources in Sudekia say that due to this recent "look down their nose at Africa once again", mentality and attitude, they expect the financial markets to work against the validity of the Bongolesian Currency, known as "The Bling-Bling". This will increase prices throughout the country and lead to inflation, as well as perhaps even fuel more civil unrest while the government attempts to solve the situation.
Meanwhile despite a curfew and increased police/security presence, civil unrest continues in Kensington-Hyde-White and Waughtown for a second day as for the first time, the delightful aroma of CS riot control gas graced the air and noses of protestors. Despite firing dispersal gas into the crowds of protesters and day shoppers at the local outlet store, civil unrest continues in these two cities, with the largest and most active in Kensington-Hyde-White. National Government officials are working with local leaders to stop the unrest and address issues of concern and restoring order.
Unhappy citizens in Kensington-Hyde-White show their frustration ...
"Suck on this!" Riot gas used on protesters to help restore order...
Meanwhile in Hollywood California, cinema legend and all time acting superstar Alan Alda has offered his services to the US Government to fly him to either the Cayman Islands or Switzerland to meet with Bongolesian Officials to discuss how he can help mediate a succesful ending to the current issues plaguing the nation.
Can he do it? Alan Alda offers his services to help stop "The Bongolesian Issue and to make sure that it's America's Fault"...
STAY TUNED TO ENN FOR MORE NEWS ON THIS UNFOLDING DRAMA AS IT HAPPENS!!!!
1 comment:
The credit card is great...brought a smile to my face :-D
Pretty realistic looking report..
Cheers
paul
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